I have searched my entire life for my identity. At different stages I thought I had found it, and was semi-ok with it, only to see it suddenly shift and the unending search was on again.
In high-school, I found it in sports. I wasn’t the greatest athlete, but I was good enough to receive a few accolades along the way. I loved being the guy known for THAT game that no one will forget. Until they did.
College started another search when the reality of being 5’9″ tall hit. I started out with a scholarship in music and decided that could be a good path for some identification. The musician card played out pretty well. I was able to make a living for the next several years, and LOVED being known as the guy on stage playing keyboard. I even grew my hair long so I could look the part. Until it started falling out.
The next stop on the identity train was moving from the back of the stage to the front. If I started a church, people would finally see the full potential of my gifts. I wouldn’t just be known as a the musician, but as THE pastor. That was all cool until I realized how insulated it had been standing behind a keyboard on the back of the stage. The pressure was on.
Now, I am no longer on a stage every week. My jump shot left right after the knees did. My daughter is becoming a much better piano player than I ever was. I am finally learning to lean more and more into Ephesians 2:10:
For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
I was created in Christ Jesus to do good works. That’s it. That’s my identity.
But why is that so hard to find?
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